Every night, before bed, I take Seroquel, which does the wondrous task of shutting my brain defect (yes, I named my brain defect Andrew) up.

You see, normally, Andrew would not shut up. All night it was “Hey! Micah! Let me tell you somethin’!” or “Hey! Micah! Guess What? Seriously, Guess?”

So, Seroquel was step one on killing Andrew.

On Monday, my doctor prescribed step two: Trileptal (also known as Oxcarbazepine). Interestingly, its an antiepileptic drug. Apparently, my brain cells are in a constantly active state or in a completely depressed state. The chemicals that regulate brain function (not breathing – those functions are always on; but the higher functions surrounding thought and emotion) dont do a good job. Rather they are in constant disarray.

This medication is supposed to, over time, settle my brain chemistry to operate in a more regulated fashion.

How is that manifested? Well, the hypomania (where I am bouncing off the walls) and the depressed state (paranoia, irratability and lethargy) will disappate. I will be in a more normal state consistently.

This drug takes about three weeks to kick in. And the doctor explained that at best, there is a 60% chance that a drug treatment will work.

So, Andrew, you have a 60% chance of being dead in three weeks. Live it up while you can, sucker.

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