Yesterday morning, I got home from Gnomedex 8.0 and after 24 hours, I have finally been able to distill the conference. It was my first time attending Gnomedex, but not the first time hearing about it.

In 2000, I worked at a startup in San Francisco Bay Area. One of the developers suggested I check out a website called Lockergnome (really an email list), run by some dude named Chris Pirillo, because they had a lot of interesting Windows 95/98 stuff. He was really excited for Chris’ conference called Gnomedex.

“What’s with the gnomes?” I thought to myself. “Must be some developer thing.”

Fast forward to 2008. Im working at Lijit. My friend Jeremy Wright of b5media asks if I am going to Gnomedex. Aaron Brazell laments that he wont be able to make Gnomedex this year. Tara Anderson tells me about how Gnomedex last year was so successful for the company.

So I went.

Thank God I did.

Of the three, Gnomedex was the smallest. Which, of course, made it easier to talk to folks. But, where the difference was most evident was in the sessions themselves. Here is the main reason why Gnomedex was amazing:

There was, literally, no hallway conversation. Everyone was in the sessions.

So, my three rules of Gnomedex:

1) Prepare to feel dumb.

The dude who drives the Mars Rover spoke. Some guy spoke on Cyborgs. Someone else spoke on voice controlled joysticks.

Right.

But, none of the attendees made me feel stupid. Some would even sit with me and explain what was said on stage, and to be clear it wasnt all that heady. Ben Huh, presentation about the growth of Pet Holdings, Inc was amazing and funny. It was great to see someone apply real science to the concept of memes.

2) Prepare to be real.

The attendees’ bullshit meter is uncanny. Attendees walked out of sessions, confronted speakers, questioned presentation points. The rule of being real was in serious effect.

3) Prepare to be amazed.

Amazed by the speakers? sure. The attendees? sure. But mostly, the calmness of the proceedings. Everyone was there to enjoy themselves, interact and learn. Some learned more than others. Some interacted more. But, everyone was almost…well, as cliche as it is, familial. Chris’ wife and parents helped with the conference. There is a real respect and love for Chris that was evident in the room. And, more than any other conference I have attended, a real respect for each other.

Nice work Chris and Ponzi. But more so, nice work Gnomedex community. See you in ‘09!

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For the past year or so, I have heard talk of an “unconference.” My response was usually the same: “What the hell is an unconference?” It seemed counter-intuitive. A bunch of people getting together, with a couple standing up and staying “I want to talk about blah.”

An agenda is then created, and sessions are presented much in the same way that a normal conference is run. Unconferences tend to be free or very, very cheap, and, usually, seem to be rather technical.

The first ones were called BarCamps (I believe), which reminds me of PubCon, which was started by some Search Engine Marketers that couldnt afford to go to the main search engine marketing show (Search Engine Strategies) in London, so met in a pub next to the conference hotel.

PubCon has now grown into a huge conference run by Brett Tabke of WebMasterWorld, so I suppose its not really an unconference anymore.

Why does all this matter?

Unconferences are no longer the counter culture of trade conferences. They happen everywhere and all the time. Even BlogHer had a unconference (where men could actually speak!).

It seems that people have realized that real power of conferences are the people, and by stripping away agendas and exhibit halls and $1000 entry fees, people are getting that access.

Today, I sit at id345’s coworking space (yes coworking still sucks), listening to people talk about iphone application development. I am blogging because 99.9% of the words uttered by these brilliant folks are passing right over my head (I understand: iphone, iphone app, business development, monetization and starbucks).

Some of the top names in Mac and iPhone development, like Bret Simmons, creator of NetNewsWire, Erica Sudan of TUAW, and Bill Dudney, who wrote several books on OS X development have swung by. I would have never met either of them if this was a traditional conference. (Even more impressive was Bill’s son, who has an iPhone app developed and on the way to the app store. I believe he is 10 years old.)

At the same time, there are iPhone Dev Camps going on in San Francisco, India, Austin, Portland, Chicago, London, Paris and Seattle. There is a ton of cross communication with Adobe (one of the sponsors) video collaboration products. Cost to the attendees? Zero.

On August 16th, I will be attending WordCamp. A unconference taking place in San Francisco and centered around WordPress has around 200 attendees registered. The agenda? Unknown. The people? Fantastic.

Repeat after me: Its the people. Its the people. Its the people.

What is Web 2.0? Its the people.

What is the social web? Its the people.

What the hell is an unconference? Its the people.

‘Nuff said.

I am often chided for always being right. I am unsure of why people think that being right all the time is a bad thing, but hey, who am I to tell them something different.

When I am wrong, tho, I will often pretend that I forgot the question or situation, which ensure that my being right all the time streak continues.

I am a man right? We are always right.

Except when we are wrong.

I assumed that BlogHer would be a bunch of women that were mixed in this manner:

- 10% real “business” women, who understood the importance of the internet in furthering their businesses.

- 60% women who blogged for fun and went to a few conferences each year. These women all kinda know each other from various conferences and would rather clique-y.

- 29% women who came because they were friends with someone from the previous two groups.

- 1% men. Most are either husbands/boyfriends or folks (like me) that work for a company that would like to learn how to present our product to this group of women.

In some ways, I am right about that.

But, what I didnt expect is: Thats not a bad thing.

Women are different then men. I am right about.

But, what has been the most interesting thing for me, is that women in large groups are exactly the same as men.

They share. They learn. They meet. They support.

Thats right, ladies. That the dirty secret of what we men do when we are in large groups.

You know what we also do? We consider women as accessories, while we men “do business.”

Which is exactly how I feel today.

But not in a bad way. I have a lot to learn from the women around me. I am right about this.

BlogHer allows women the proper comfort zone in which to speak freely and openly about issues that have no gender lines (entrepreneurship, depression, bipolar, etc.) or things that are specific to women.

I feel like a 6 year old again when I would listen to my mom with her friends talk about their issues of the day. Where I found myself learning new stuff every day (did you know that there are specific times when wearing white pants is bad? Me neither.)

So, what am I wrong about?

BlogHer is not a tech conference. BlogHer is not some exclusive place for women where men would be treated as afterthoughts, as intruders or unwelcome.

We may not be celebrated for our attendence but we are allowed to learn.

Which is fantastic. I am right about that.