Last night, Denver and I broke up. Thats right, the city of Denver is on the outs with me.

The following is a chat session I had with some friends where I explained basically what happened. There is a lot of cursing, so if you are offended, you might want to close your eyes or have someone read you the following.

Imagine this was a company or store. I had a horrible experience. With social media, I am directly touching more than 12,500 people through Twitter, this blog and facebook. Imagine if that group of 12,500 shares this with their followers and friends. How many people are going to hear about how awful the experience I had with the city of Denver was? 100,000? 1,000,000? Seems cities, like companies, should do their best to listen to their customers (residents and visitors) and act accordingly.

In my discussions of influence I always say influence is just a one to one activity where I can affect the actions of another. What if this is just the beginning of an “influence chain”?

Must of the following is humorous, but scary for businesses. It no longer matters if you are a store, a city, a state or a country. Your customers and residents not only have a voice, they have INFLUENCE.

I challenge businesses and governments to be better. If you are unsure how to, call me. 720-231-7120. or email me. micah [at] currentwisdom [dot] com. or tweet me @micah. But dont allow your lack of understanding or belief to stop you.

I might be one person, but there are 30,000,000 people just like me on twitter, 75,000,000 of us blogging and 200,000,000 vocal users on Facebook. The power is truly with the people.

Here is the chat discussion uncut. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. Except mine.

Me: ok

Me: so here is the story

Me: Im at a coffee shop with friends

Me: ok one friend

Me: I dont really have friends

Me: I walk out of the shop at 5:30, car is booted

Me: I call them

Me: $600 later, I pay for tickets I already paid for

Me: they say you have a default boot

Me: I say you are a fucking retard, because there is a keypad, so give me the code so I can take it off

Me: they say there is no keypad

ST: lol

ST: “ok one friend”

Me: I say, I am not blind you stupid motherfuckers, there is a keypad

Me: we argue about the existence of the keypad for like 5 min

Me: finally, I give up.

ST:this is funny

Me: They say by 7pm, some one will come to take the boot off.

MP: I’m writing the screenplay now.

Me: its 5:30, so I say fine.

Me: I will wait

Me: at 6:45pm, I call back

Me: I say, hey, so no one has come to take off the boot

Me: they say, oh, we meant 7pm EST. You are in central time, so you will have to wait until tomorrow.

Me: I say, stupid motherfucker, I am in mountain time. go get someone to take off the boot.

Me: they say, sorry, everyone has gone home.

Me: I hang up the phone

Me: I call back

Me: I tell my story

Me: I mention that there is a serial number for the boot on the citation. I read it to them

Me: they say, oh, that boot is on another car

Me: I say

Me: well, I dont say anything

Me: because clearly they dont believe I have the ability to see that there is a boot on my car

Me: I say, nicely, there is a boot on my car

Me: the serial number is 9743

Me: they say thats impossible

Me: that boot is not on your car

Me: I hang up

Me: I call back

Me: I tell my story

Me: the lady says, Im sorry for the inconvenience

Me: I ask that she apologize for the stupidity as well

Me: she doesnt find it funny

Me: I stop a meter maid

Me: (except its a dude who is clearly a douchebag)

ST: im cracking up

Me: he says, booting is not my department

Me: I say, you put it on there, take the fucker off

Me: he says, I am only trained in putting them on

Me: I said clearly

Me: he calls the dispatch

Me: they say everyone went home, and I will have to wait until the next day to get my car

Me: I said I hate you all and I hope you die. Except I said it like this

Me: “thanks very much”

ST: lol

Me: then I called a friend who picked me up and drove me to boulder

Me: we grabbed dinner

Me: since I had no car and he drove me

Me: he dropped me off at my house

Me: I get a call from new jersey

ST: how far is boulder from denver??

Me: “hello mr. baldwin, this the supervisor of the boot removal department”

Me: 40 miles

BH: apparently Denver is now in NJ

ST: ah

Me: “and we have removed your boot”

ST: hahaha

Me: I say, thats great, since its 9pm, and the meters run until 10pm, I better not have a ticket.

Me: so danny drives me down to denver.

Me: it starts to rain

Me: thunder

Me: lightening

BH: oh shite

Me: I get to my car

Me: the boot is gone

Me: there is no ticket

BH: THERE’S A TICKET

Me: I get in my car

BH: oh

BH: fuck

BH: change the story

Me: and I drive up in a torrential downpour

Me: and now I am finally home

ST: that was quite an ending

Me: after paying $610 in parking fines I HAVE ALREADY PAID

Me: and waiting 7.5 hours for the boot to be removed.

ST: so are you going to fight it?

Me: the end

ST: fight city hall!

ST: that sucks man

Me: I will never enter the city of denver again

Me: so the boot was invented in denver

Me: but its a new boot called the smart boot, of which the operation of it is outsourced to philadelphia

BH: Better than being outsourced to some foreign country

MP: another change in the story… outsourced to NJ

Me: fuck me

Me: http://learntoduck.com/humor/first-denver-smart-boot-recipient

MP: Thank you very much

Me: I wrote that the first time I paid the tickets

Me: is that unbelievable or what?

Me: then I was having fun writing horribly vitriol tweets about denver, so I went with it.

MP: For you Micah, a thousand times more believable.

BH: the best part is where they keep telling you that you’re a lying muthefucker

Me: lol

Me: I KNOW!

Me: my favorite part

Me: the lady says “According to our records you have a default boot”

Me: I say “according to my eyeballs I have a smart boot”

BH: Micah: I’m a Jew

BH: Boot: No you’re not

Me: lol

BH: Micah: No, I’m looking at my circumcised dick right now

BH: Boot: Sir, our records indicate that you are a woman

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