I like to be inspired.

I consume words like my life depends on it. I watch people relate their stories. I listen to others successes…and failures.

I read. A lot. Blogs. Books. Opinion Pieces. Not the news. Nothing to be inspired by the evil reported in the news.

I have found that inspiration comes from many places. Often the inspiring words are not meant to provide inspiration, but are tossed out with disregard.

A few months ago, Jeffrey and I were having a conversation about phobias. I was relating that my greatest fear is disappointment. I fear constantly that I will disappoint family, friends, coworkers, myself. I am driven by that simple fact.

“Dont be a disappointment.”

Jeffrey is deathly afraid of heights. He joked about how he almost didnt get a Land Rover because of how high it was off the ground.

“You know fear of heights isnt about falling.” He said. “Its about landing. hard.”

I chuckled, but that line stuck in my head.

Earlier, I was watching Behind the Music about Pink (followed about one about Lil’ Wayne). The show, of course, followed its standard arc of big win followed by big failure followed by coming back strong.

I used to think that arc was stupid. Until my life followed that exact arc.

In the show on Pink, she talked about how she was less successful because she had forgotten how to fail. She had become afraid to fail.

Lil’ Wayne talked about dealing with failure by continuing to move forward. That the worst thing was to fail and then spend time dwelling on that failure. His fear centered on not achieving his potential.

(When I was in kindegarden, my “report card” had two comments on it from the teacher. 1) Micah hasnt lived up to his potential; 2) I wish he would shut up.)

If you look at each of those fears: disappointment, heights, failure and potential, their basis is the same.

The fear is that the final state is permanent. That there is no coming back from disappointment, failure, or falling. That if you never achieve your potential, you never will.

Fears keep us from doing (never from not doing). Fears force us to compromise. Fears keep us from being.

And as I, officially, quit my job to join a startup with no money but a great team and product, my natural fears (disappointment mostly) have stared me squarely in the face. Most would say its only natural.

I, on the other hand, am saying whats normal is recognizing the fear and moving on. I, on the other hand, trust in myself and the team I am joining to succeed.

I am focusing on the bounce.

Now that we have that out of the way… :)

Over the next couple of years or so as I help build this company up (I promise to reveal the company soon. There are a couple of things that need to be worked out first, not trying to be coy) I am going to write proactively and transparently about many of the decisions we will be making. I might even start using video.

Hopefully, you will be able to share in my mistakes, our successes, and be able to second guess everything.

While my fear is being disappointing; my passion is success.

I cant wait to let everyone share in my passion…

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